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Bullying from Anon

Dear Gerald,
I am being mercilessly but fairly bullied with names such as ‘Ginger Snaps, Ginger Nuts, Ginger Tosser, Tintin, Ginger Minger, Copper Nob, Sailor, Greaseball, Shiny Shorts, Captain Haddock, Orange Peel, Grubby Grundies and Gaylord’ due to my fine auburn locks. What should I do about it?
Anon, from Framley

Dear Perry,
You’ve been struggling with these issues for twenty years now, don’t you think it’s time you got over it? I’ve told you enough times about the use of hair dye. Deal with it.
Kind Regards, Gerald

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