‘Groves’ – supplied by Martyn Stimson

Here is an amusing story supplied by young Martyn. It seems that the chant “only one Perry Groves” is not entirely accurate…


Having ginger hair and a slight resemblance to the great man, I suppose the Colchester United connection also helps, I have been likened to him in the past in a similar way to that any ginger bloke growing up in the 80s was likened to Boris Becker. Now, never wishing to miss out on a possible scam, I thought I’d take advantage of this likeness. I happened to be in London one day and decided to go to Highbury in the evening to watch Arsenal (or at least their reserves) play Birmingham in the Coca Cola Cup. I rang first to check that the game wasn’t sold out (which it wasn’t) but got a little carried away and told them that I was Perry Groves. I went on to say that a friend and I were in the area tonight and would like to see the game and wondered if we could have two complimentary tickets. To my surprise the said that would be fine. We turned up at Highbury for the game, less than convinced that we’d get away with it, and I went strode up to the ticket office and announced that I was Perry Groves and that there should be two tickets reserved for me. To my surprise the girl serving, who didn’t look old enough to remember Perry, replied with a “Yes, Mr Groves, here you go” and handed me an envelope with two tickets in it without even questioning it. Then to cap it all it said on the ticket Price: 0.00 with the words Perry Groves down the side.

Several years later I went to see some of the Football Masters competition, the 6-a-side football competition for ex-pros, and the teams that were playing were Arsenal, Spurs, West Ham, and Charlton. Had I have known that Perry was playing for Arsenal I would have taken the ticket along and asked him to sign it but unfortunately it was only when I got the programme out and looked up who the fat shaven headed bloke, who resembled the freak in the Goonies, was that I realised that Perry was there… and to think I bear a striking (no pun intended) resemblance to him! :o)

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